Saturday, March 19, 2011

Will.

So the new interview went well today. Safe to say I aced it with my charming personality and good looks (thanks genetics!). If I had any experience, I'd be a sure thing. However, I don't. So they want me to take a few classes (30). At the end of 15, I'd be able to work and get more experience (see auditioning for things*) which would be fantastic. However, it costs to take classes. It costs a lot. And even though they are paying half, plus a bunch extra, my pocketbook is coughing up dust. They always say, "Where there is a will, there is a way." Well, this girl has a lot of will and no way. I'm hoping to come up with a way soon because this is such a big will that I'm not sure what to do. Mind you, I'm not passionate about a bunch of things, nor do I obsess over things much. Unless it's a worry, but that's a different story. There are also very few things that I have allowed to linger along in the back of my mind gnawing at me to pay it some attention. I'm paying attention and going with my gut on it. But everything else can't keep up. Honest to say, I feel rather defeated, deflated and discouraged. It's like hearing over again "You can't" "You won't" "Not good enough." But with more oompf because I'm finally taking the initiative to follow my quiet dream. I think I need some reassurance, a plan, a pint of Ben and Jerry's (the chocolate fudge brownie one please) and a fresh mind. And a classic movie as a bonus. It seems that I can't win for losing, but you know what they say....Where there's a will there's a way. This girl is going to find a way.

0 comments: