MACU hats

Here's the latest hat! It's going to be in the MACU student lounge office and hopefully there'll be another one and a few other cute things. I swear that yellow is gold and the green is really hunter green. Darn artificial light skewing the colors!

saturday ramblings

Today there was a stellar basketball game between my school and some rival that we have. We won by a little more than thirty points and was a pretty great time all in all. I got to hang out a little with the president of my school and his wife and granddaughter. Adorable child.

And now, after my thrifing trip and Wal*mart run I'm just sitting here on my bed finding no motivation to make these hats that I need to get started on. I also have a mini order for an elephant and have been swearing I'd make a horse for a while. Ugh motivation find meeeee!

it was sunny today. love the sun!

Dog Commandments.

amen.

Worry.

Worry is a funny thing. It strikes seemingly out of nowhere just to remind you that it has been there all the time. Just hanging out in the back of your mind, waiting for you to let your guard down just that tiny bit and then BAM. Bring you to your knees, feel like the world is spiraling out of control into a black hole, tears in your eyes, don't want to get out of bed feeling. It's a less than ideal feeling. Less than ideal meaning it's the pits. What's even funnier about worry is how people react to it when you say you are dealing with it. There's generally two approaches to it. The "Poor baby, let me listen" and then the "Matthew Six. Matthew six." For all you non-Christian folks, that's a chapter in the Bible that talks about not worrying. Both reactions tend to fall short of what's needed. Or what I imagine is needed. The Poor Baby approach leaves one...okay me...feeling belittled and unheard. Though people are listening, you can tell they've zoned out to what they are going to wear tomorrow or who is hotter than who. By the time two minutes is over, the listener is gone and I'm left feeling...well just as I did before. Worried. Worried that I may have done or said something wrong to where the person wanted to stop listening. Worried that I am just wasting their time. More worried than before.
The second group, the Matthew Sixes....well...pretty sure the frustration with that is kinda clear. Beyond the a verse isn't a real answer part, there's the am I not Christian enough? Is the reason I worry because I haven't been following God as well as I have been? As silly as these questions seem to some,it's a real struggle. Yes there is grace and forgiveness, but sometimes it's just that little voice saying you obviously haven't been good enough because of x,y,z. It may have been the way I grew up or it may just be my nature, but understanding grace is hard. It's a confusing topic and really hard to grasp sometimes. And some people, the facts of it just come easily and they don't understand why it's such a hard concept. Those people are lucky and really blessed.
Is there a right way to respond to someone who worries? I don't know. Unfortuently I can't give a set of rules to abide by for that. I can suggest listening with empathy and not tuning them out. Not making their worries feel stupid, even if they are. Quoting scripture at them probably won't help either. I'd say think about all the things you've worried about. Remember how it felt and what you wanted. Though it may not be the same thing, it might be close. At the very least, just be there. When you're worried and it feels like everything is crashing down, sometimes all it takes is one person being there to set the earth back on its axis. And if you are ever worried, I'm sorry. I am so truly, deeply sorry. I know how it feels and I hate every moment when I am, so I figure it must be the same for you. Just know that eventually everything does get better. It'll take some work, and a whole lot of hope, but it does. And crying isn't shameful. Just let it out. I hope someone is there to catch you too. Because I know how much it sucks when it doesn't seem like there is. Worry is a sneaky little jerk. But like all jerks, he can be taken down.

squared

Square update!
Please excuse the giant one on the bottom...I stopped paying attention and did one too many rounds. The red ones are pretty sweet, maybe that'll be the second blanket?
32 to go

bellsprout

I have a heat pad. One that my mom used to have and I'm pretty sure one of these days it'll catch on fire. Hopefully that won't be tonight as it is tied to my back at this point. Whoever invented heat pads I would love to thank. They are pure genius. Them and the person who came up with chocolate chips. Lovely lovely invention.

As much as I'd like to go on about the wonders of modern living (thank goodness I wasn't raised Amish). There's this new hat I'd like to show off. My friend requested a pixie style hat and after a bit of searching I found one to go off of that she liked. She also wanted it striped, which I thought was kinda cool. Before she took it home I managed to snag a pic (or five) of it to show off.Here's two of them. At the time I was taking them my friend S was in the room laughing at me, and the show we were watching, hence the weird faces I made.

Side View!

Front View!

So, there's the new hat. Opinions? I think it might be cute in more flowery colors and put on a small child....but that's just my thought. Now I need to refocus on my granny squares. I only have nine of the 52 I want to have done. Terribly slacking on it. I did make something else this past weekend, but I can't show it yet because it's being sent to someone for their birthday later this week. Can't wait to post that up!

Happy monday nights!

optimistic

Her nails are painted blue

like the summer sky in June.

It's the little but of optimism you can find.
Her eyes are clouded over with the storm she just endured

her heart as hardened as a stone.

It's hard to get to know her,

to get below the surface.
It takes time that most aren't willing to give.

But if you tried just hard enough, you'd find a little treasure.
What she hides from most others is a million and one dreams.
A soul that's just as compassionate as can be.
Eyes that start to cry, at most anything even remotely sad or happy.
Laughter that is just waiting to burst.
An optimistic heart over shadowed by a pessimistic mind.
Until you get to know her, all that you'll ever find
is that little piece of optimism
the June sky shade of blue.

78-70

MACU won in it's basketball game against Patrick Henry College. It's been awhile since a game was one and I fully attribute it to the fact there was a vuvuzela in the crowd. Pretty sure that instrument has magical game winning properties. It was pretty fun to listen to all the comments the guys had about the game; it gets pretty crazy sometimes. Now I'm just chilling in my room with my awesome babushka-like earwarmer. Some point this night I get to start a new hat pattern for my dear friend A. She wants a pixie style hat and I'm kinda excited about the colors she chose because it opens up a lot of choice in striping, blocking and so forth. Now she just has to decide on a type.

Setting it up to be a mindless night. Love it!

sqaures!

This is the start of my newest project. 52 squares for the 52 weeks in a year. I figured it out to where if i make 3 squares a day, I should have it done in about 17 days. I also figured out that if i want a 4ft by 4.5 ft blanket I'd need 81 squares and to finish that in two weeks I'd have to do 5.7 squares a day. Also, if I decide to do the 1-up mushroom blanket in a month, I'd have to make 11.6 squares a day.

That's a lot of squares.

I'm ready. Let's get it started now...

Oh yeah!

Granny Squares

So a new thing has happened and I'm kinda proud of it and very apprehensive at the same time. A few ladies I know, as well as myself, are now getting together on Tuesdays to crochet some granny squares up in the hopes of making a afghan at the end of 52 squares. That's one every week. There really is no time limit and is more of a learn how to group, and everyone is working at their own speed. The first meeting went fairly well. I'm not going to say that I thought it went so smoothly that melted butter looked rough, but it went pretty well. I had major frustration, but it wasn't with any of the ladies that were there for the learning. Anyway, going back to granny squares reminded me of my first major project which was this huge granny square blanket. I never did finish it because around the time I would have been finishing it I was moving from one house to the next and it was hitting senior year of high school so time and confusion were hitting me hard. I wish I could find that project now and finish it up. It was a pretty neat blanket, all done in my school colors of black and orange. Now I'm just using up scrap yarn in the hope of making my stash a little less plentiful so I can buy different yarns later. I'm hoping to loose at least two skeins in two weeks. Hopefully I can do it!
It's amazing what granny squares can be used for. Blankets, bags, dogs, all sorts of things. And apparently famous designers are using them to make clothes! Who knew they were so hip? This is from Paul Smith's Fall 2010 collection. Not something I would wear probably, but still pretty hip and kinda hot....

I am really looking forward to next week's meeting because I love to share the craft that I love. Also, I kinda like showing off the random creatures that I have made. Most recently, I made this little ninja guy. While I'm not exactly thrilled with how he came out, he does have that poor puppy on the side of the road covered in mud while it is raining type of look. He's starting to grow on me. If you want to check him out, check out the facebook page.

Almost done with the first week of the semester. I was celebrating with oreos, but then found out there were only two left. That few just isn't acceptable for a real celebration so I'm trying to find the will to whack open my chocolate orange. Poor, poor orange...

Snl is done!

Sunday Night Live is officially over with! I'm so excited that it is over for the weekend so now I can just chill out after registration tomorrow for a type of break before work. Sadly, my dorm is overrun with high schoolers. I like them, I really do and I love that they are here to serve with my school for the MLK day of service, however, I wish they were a lot quieter. Oh how I wish they'd all go to sleep so I can get some too...ha ha. I can't wait for classes to start up on Tuesday, nor can I wait to get to work tomorrow and find out all the catch up work I've got to get through. My job is pretty much awesome and the people I work with are super cool too. And it looks like I have all my christian service hours figured out so I have way more than enough to graduate! Yay! Now I just have to focus on getting my GPA even higher and GRE studies so I can get my master's soon!

Beyond all the school stuff happening this weekend, I really haven't had any inner reflection time. It kinda frustrates me, but its ok because I know that after this first week, everything will calm down to where I'll be able to focus on being calm and such. Having alone time is really important to me, and I really dislike going a while without sitting down and reading a book or doing some light crafting. Speaking of crafting, got some new stuff up in the 'store'. You should check it out (here). Pretty spiffy. Also, don't forget to 'like' the page cause seeing the number go up makes my day.

That's all I have for now. I'm worn out after spending the day in the gym with my lights. I love lights and technical theater. So much fun.

Today was the last super long day of class. I am really thankful that tomorrow is a short day, made shorter by a wonderful thirty minute delay. While I understand and somewhat enjoy learning about what the professor is teaching us, I think that this class could and should be so much more. Anyway, it wasn't what I was expecting when time rolled around for me to sign up for classes, but its okay. Right now, the end of class seems so awesome.

That's pretty much it today... Class pretty much drained everything.

heart

Heart on my sleeve?

Pish.
I keep my heart in my hand.

but really...
i do...

semester

I am excited for this semester's classes. Cross-Cultural Counseling, Counseling Theories, Abnormal Psychology are the top ones so far. World Religions. The only one I think I dislike already is Algebra. I hate math. I hate math a lot. So...my list is looking awesome. Mostly because its light enough for me to do great on my job and really get going on the search for the masters program I want. Oh and internship things...

Excited.

Back. back to school

So I made it back to school. The flights and everything weren't too bad, but the landings did give me enough scare to where I don't want to fly again for a while. Strangest part of the trip was the snow that hit when I landed in Virginia. I'm not a fan of snow but thought it was pretty cool that I avoided it all the way up till I hit the east coast again.

Other news, got a new hat done. Its a simple slouch for my friend who kindly watched my car over break. She asked for one like my purple one, but I didn't have enough yarn so I tried to incorporate that yarn in with the green. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out because there's a slight texture difference in the yarns that adds a neat variation. Here's the picture of it...please ignore the flight hair and not happy disposition (flying makes me unhappy)...

There it is! Now I'm going to take a much needed nap before my ride arrives to so I can reclaim my car!

sick

I am miserable. It's just over a day before I leave for school again and lo and behold I have what is quite possibly strep. There's no tea or juice in sight either so I'm sucking it up with some throat drops and water. Eventually I'll try that whole salt water thing again, but it never ends up pretty. Days like these are when I feel more pitiful than anything. I hate feeling sick without being sick and I kinda wish there was someone to take care of me and dote on my whims. It's funny that a sore throat can bring me to my knees, but when I had a possible broken leg (see previous posts relating to MRI) all is cool. Sigh. Looks like an early night for me. After some semi-hearty soup and packing of jeans. Half packed and it looks like everything is going to fit*. Whoot!

*by fit i mean most of my yarn is going with me. hiphip hooray!

p.s. going to start a cowl pretty soon and some scarflets so keep an eye out....

New Year

Well, it is a bit into the new year. Still feels like 2010 to me because it doesn't feel like much has changed. Still no snow in sight for me, and I am rather pleased to have only been through a couple snow days this winter...with both of them being in North Carolina. To catch up since the last blog, I've been in Kansas visiting my family there. I quite nearly love it there and would possibly live there one day. It was great and I got to spend a lot of time with my grandparents and mom. I liked it.

Back to the new year we're in. According to my number for the year, I should look forward to new experiences and travels. This oddly goes with the fortune I got from a fortune cookie. And a text from a bff. Seems odd to me.

Anyway, this year is just....yeah for me so far. I found out today that I'm leaving a day earlier than what I thought I was. Which ruins the timeline I had in my head, but that's whatever now. Can't change it so just gotta go with it. Filled two more shelves with books. I am quite happy about this, as I'm an avid reader and am kinda proud of my books. I can barely decide which ones to take to school and which ones to leave for the summer. Books are grand. As it stands right now, I'm only taking five, maybe six books to school. I'm mostly okay with this. Specially when I look at the fact I'm taking most of my yarn here to school. Crazy, I know. But yarn weighs less and thus is cheaper to fly back.

If you're wondering, yes. I am worried about flying back. Cue anxiety in three...two...one...

I can't think of much else to say. I'm trying to decompress from the weekend and think over everything and mentally pack. Distracted is my name right now and avoidance is the game. Christmas was grand.