yesterday my cat died.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
thought by Just Becca at 5:24 PM
Monday, September 27, 2010
thought by Just Becca at 10:41 PM
Sunday, September 26, 2010
I have one and a quarter papers to finish and a few services to type up. However, I do not feel motivated to do it at all. Its the horrible cycle of its not due till noon tomorrow and then the I know it'll take me all of an hour to do it. Now, its not that I don't know how to do it ('cept IBL. No idea on that at all), I'm pretty smart and a very good writer when the will and need strikes. I am just an amazing procrastinator. And what sucks more about that is the fact that it completely and utterly stresses me out. And when I stress, I stress about stressing and then become even more stressed out that I cannot stop stressing. All of that takes its toll in a few ways: either I can't sleep, eat or stop 'doing' or all I do is sleep, over eat and become lethargic. Never is it in the middle, always one extreme or the other. Like currently, I'm stressing out that I am not doing my work, which has caused me to clench my jaw all day, which means now I have a sore jaw and pretty nice little headache. Plus, this go around I'm in the second category so I have been loafing around all day. However, I did make some head way on my work. Its just not enough. What sucks even more is that because of my 'dealing' strategies, not even notices when I'm fully stressed out. The close friends I have can tell, but many others cannot. And when its the weekend and everyone is home, or on their way back, or just not here, there really isn't anyone to stop and ask if I'm okay and if everything is going well. Which is something that I would really love someone to recognize and ask. Not being asked stresses me out. That's probably weird. What's even weirder is now I'm stressing out that I can write an entire blog, but I can't get past a second page on a paper on my opinions. Ugh. Right now, I would like a dimly lit bath with a ton of bubbles and warm water, some good soft music, soft towels and a good book. Relaxation. A moment to recollect my self and then begin the slow, methodical process of typing.
thought by Just Becca at 11:19 PM
Friday, September 24, 2010
This past 24 hour period was a real roller coaster. If you know me well, you'd know I hate roller coasters. They make me ill, and cry, and pretty much just want to break down. That's both the real ones and metaphorical ones. Pretty much, I started out on this pretty nice ride, got to an unexpected high and crashed without much warning. The realist in me knew it was coming so I was kinda prepared, but the silly optimist squelched it's warnings and just let it go on. It...yeah. Long story short, not fun.
However, this is going to be a fun weekend. Or at least it looks like it will be. A few of us are supposed to go to the beach, which I am completely stoked about. I love going to the beach and hanging out with my friends. Mostly I love the beach, but don't tell them that...
thought by Just Becca at 7:27 PM
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
lets just walk at night
and take pictures of the crazy things we see.
Telling stories from our memories.
I'll show you the knights and dragons,
you'll show me the maiden fair.
We'll spin a tale through the midnight air.
And when we come the the end of the path,
film spent and story waned,
i'll gasp as we look back and you'll take my hand,
as we trek back, once again.
thought by Just Becca at 1:22 AM
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Lately things seem to be in a rush and in slow motion at the same time. Which is really weird considering nothing is out of normal. Nothing much has changed beyond the date. Maybe its the anticipation of something big that I am not currently aware of. Or it could just be the stack of things that seem to have piled up when I wasn't looking. Not that things really have piled up, but I want to think so, so that I can have a better reason to procrastinate.
thought by Just Becca at 3:04 PM
Friday, September 17, 2010
thought by Just Becca at 6:27 PM
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
To flatter and follow others, without being flattered and followed in turn, is but a state of half enjoyment.
thought by Just Becca at 11:22 AM
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
its worked quite well so far to raise my grade
(much less theirs haha)
thought by Just Becca at 4:14 PM
Friday, September 10, 2010
Something that needs to be done more often is walking on the beach at night. Along with that is the night picture taking, which I have a great fondness for. I like to take pictures at that time because everything is just more mystical and neat. Also- its super rare for me to be at the beach after dark so it makes it even more special. I like it. A lot. So if you're ever wondering about what you should do with me, take me to the beach at night and bring a good camera and a flashlight.
It'd be fun.
thought by Just Becca at 12:05 AM
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
This evening I sat outside on one of the swings reading until it came for the sun to set. I had been anticipating this and forgotten that you can't see the sun set out here. This summer when I wasn't working, I sat outside on my front porch and watched the sun go down and every time the awesomeness of it was just wonderful. There was this one sunset that I enjoyed the most. In short, it was perfect.
thought by Just Becca at 10:16 PM
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Today was sneak day. Sneak day is the time honored tradition where the seniors get together and plan a getaway day for the class body without telling anyone, even the professors. Naturally, the professors find out, and are okay with it. Over the recent years, they have known more about it and are asked to come, but only after 9am. This day starts at 5am by all the seniors waking up the underclassmen. My weapon of choice was the airhorn. 'Twas loud, hated and effective. This year it had been decided that we were to go to the Outer Banks of Nc, have a sunrise devo at Son Rise Church (get it? i didn't at first) and then go to Grog's. Grog's is this really cool place that rents out jetskis and has dolphin tours. The people on sneak day got to choose which one to do. I went with the dolphins considering I like them and haven't seen any that close that aren't separated from me by glass. Afterwards, we had this super nice lunch and then went to the beach for a bit. But back to lunch. I got asked to get the beans that were left at the church, so I did. And poor Aimee was the person who got to have them on her lap. Now beans have a fair bit of juice in them, well in the stuff you cook them in. And when you pair that with a container that doesn't seal all the way plus a moving vehicle, you get bean juice all over the inside of your car. It was quite an adventure and my car now smells of baked beans.
All in all, sneak day was pretty much awesome. But now I have to go memorize a bunch of words that I don't want to memorize. Frankly, I just want to go to bed. Soon. Very soon.
thought by Just Becca at 11:13 PM
Sunday, September 5, 2010
thought by Just Becca at 12:52 AM
Friday, September 3, 2010
Well Hurricane Earl has came and mostly left. It was much less stressful than everyone, including me, thought. According to the previous reports, we were supposed to get killer wind and tons of rain. It rained just enough for me to wear my super awesome galoshes, but that was about it. Its stopped now and has been for the couple hours I've been out of class. Its not really windy either. There are a few boats out on the river right now too, if that gives any more indication of what the weather is like outside. My car did get tarped yesterday evening, and I honestly have no intention of uncovering it anytime soon, because, well, it means the inside of my car is still dry and I'm perfectly okay with that. When it gets sunny and not wet I guess I'll uncover it to go places. Right now, that's not my biggest concern. Some of the crazy kids who live at the beach are going home for the weekend to chase the storm or some nonsense like that. Crazies.
In other news, by Monday there will be two new little creatures that will be finished. super excited about that! I finished one part of them last night and its super cute so I can't wait for the other to get done. :)
thought by Just Becca at 3:25 PM