Wednesday, February 2, 2011


the directing of interest inwards towards one's own thoughts and feelings rather than towards the external world

I understand introversion. Seeing as I'm an introvert it isn't a stretch of the imagination, really. I do love being around people and all but sometimes I get really overwhelmed by people. The amount, how often they are seen, etc. Sometimes it gets to be too much for me and it is really hard for me to tell that person or persons how I am feeling about their being around. So, I turn it inside and keep tit o myself. I don't want to upset someone with telling them that they need to leave or not visit. And the times that I have told them, I've been told that I am rude. I don't mean to come off that way, but it is hard to explain to people how I can't write a paper with people that aren't my roommate in the room. I can't do homework or study either because I get really frustrated. I can normally get by on a normal basis, but if I'm around people too long or visa versa, I literally shut down. Can't work, can't write, can't craft. And I can't say anything.

the directing of one's interest outwards

I'd like to be an extrovert. I'd love to not have stupid simple things bother me. I'd like to not get overwhelmed by people and their habits. I would like to be able to do homework with people around. But I'm not made like that. God didn't make me that way. And sometimes I am grateful, but most other times I am not. I'm frustrated by it and my inability to be a social butterfly. Hopefully one day I'll either come to terms with it or learn to be more extroverted and gain some balls to say when I've had enough.
but that's not today.